Impermanence
Friend works with Liberal Party, they just underwent a cabinet shuffle. She was wondering whether she'd have a job at the end of it. They just switched portfolios.
Parents - they're aging is very apparent.
Other friends - moving, having babies, breaking up relationships. All at once. The Buddha never seemed to account for why a lot of change happens in clusters. I'm curious.
Loving Compassion
Saved a baby bird the other day. All I needed was to borrow a ladder so I could stick it back in its nest. I was very surprised by how reluctant people were to help. Some were even nasty to me when a simple, "Sorry, I can't" would have sufficed. But I found someone to lend me a ladder, so it's all good.
Trying friends. Somehow I have amassed a few friends who annoy me. I do my best to just be understanding and tolerant. Then again, I have to be compassionate to my own need for sanity. So I don't spend as much time with them as I used to.
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Right Speech
It's kind of interesting that this is a part of the eight-fold path when I had already been thinking along these lines two years ago. I actually ended a friendship over the issue because I could no longer tolerate my friend consistently verbalizing his anger and hatred towards others.
The first time I spoke thoroughly about the issue was with some West Indian friends who were
running around using the word, "Nigga" with each other. It was in a counter-culture, play with language, affectionate way but it really bothered me. I myself was guilty, when hanging out with my friends of using the term, "Niggeritis". Basically, in present day it's just a reference for the lack of energy one experiences after consuming a large meal. The historical meaning however, was derogatory. During the years of slavery, often only one, very starchy meal was served to slaves. Afterwards the slaves would experience a drop in their sugar levels and that would affect their ability to work. They would often be beaten for their sluggishness, or deemed, "slow" and "lazy".
So I let them know tt bothered me because for the rest of the world "Nigga" sounds too much like, "Nigger" which still has derogotory, hateful connotations to it. So, I just told my friends that they should think about how they're using language because it isn't really helping them. Most other people don't understand what they're trying to accomplish and so they're just spewing a lot of negativity. For anyone who's family has been subject to slavery and racism they are recalling a lot of painful memories. I asked, "Is it really neccessary?" And since that time I have stopped using the term, "niggeritis". I'm not going to be putting negative energy into the world through my words.
Now I just have to work on some of my thought patters.
The first time I spoke thoroughly about the issue was with some West Indian friends who were
running around using the word, "Nigga" with each other. It was in a counter-culture, play with language, affectionate way but it really bothered me. I myself was guilty, when hanging out with my friends of using the term, "Niggeritis". Basically, in present day it's just a reference for the lack of energy one experiences after consuming a large meal. The historical meaning however, was derogatory. During the years of slavery, often only one, very starchy meal was served to slaves. Afterwards the slaves would experience a drop in their sugar levels and that would affect their ability to work. They would often be beaten for their sluggishness, or deemed, "slow" and "lazy".
So I let them know tt bothered me because for the rest of the world "Nigga" sounds too much like, "Nigger" which still has derogotory, hateful connotations to it. So, I just told my friends that they should think about how they're using language because it isn't really helping them. Most other people don't understand what they're trying to accomplish and so they're just spewing a lot of negativity. For anyone who's family has been subject to slavery and racism they are recalling a lot of painful memories. I asked, "Is it really neccessary?" And since that time I have stopped using the term, "niggeritis". I'm not going to be putting negative energy into the world through my words.
Now I just have to work on some of my thought patters.
More on Follow the Teachings Not the Teacher
I've been reflecting more on some of my "issues". All these years I've been looking outside of myself for answers that would help me come to terms with myself, some of the traumatic experiences I've endured, meaning, and comfort.
As I've moved through my life it seems that those people I have looked to for guidance have always fallen short and seriously disappointed me; spiritual leaders, parents, teachers, therapists and employers. I do not doubt that some of these figures have held valuable lessons for me but
I am realizing now that there is little in their realm of knowledge that I could not discover myself. Worse, some of these so-called mentors tried to lead me down the wrong path!
Luckily, I seem to have an orientation to the world that has enabled me to function in this world
for the most part, along the eight fold path. I don't remember a time when I was not aware of impermanence. There was never a time that I didn't feel the pull of conscience that lead, for the majority of my life, to the paths of right action and right speech. Whenever I've been lead astray it's been due to emotional attachment to the wrong person. And often it's been due to my sense of compassion. Especially when I was younger, I did not know how to uphold my boundaries while still being compassionate. Repeatedly other people were able to manipulate my naivity in this area.
I still need to work in several areas in the eight fold path and I should work on forgiving myself my naivity. I may always be working on the boundaries issue, but now I know exactly what my problem is. And I need to stop looking outside of myself for answers. I know that a lot of that is within myself already. If I do need to gather information from others, I know exactly how and where to find it. My instincts will let me know if the source of the information is reliable.
And this by the way came on the heels of a yoga instructor not responding to my repeatedly mentioning a certain pose was aggravating my sciatica. I got fed up and decided to search for some answers myself. First thing - the pose is contra-indicated for those with sciatica. Luckily, there are other poses which will help to heal the area or that I can do alternatively.
Once again, my so-called "teacher" did not respond. Once again I found the answer myself.
Lucky me I'm so bloody stubborn!!!
As I've moved through my life it seems that those people I have looked to for guidance have always fallen short and seriously disappointed me; spiritual leaders, parents, teachers, therapists and employers. I do not doubt that some of these figures have held valuable lessons for me but
I am realizing now that there is little in their realm of knowledge that I could not discover myself. Worse, some of these so-called mentors tried to lead me down the wrong path!
Luckily, I seem to have an orientation to the world that has enabled me to function in this world
for the most part, along the eight fold path. I don't remember a time when I was not aware of impermanence. There was never a time that I didn't feel the pull of conscience that lead, for the majority of my life, to the paths of right action and right speech. Whenever I've been lead astray it's been due to emotional attachment to the wrong person. And often it's been due to my sense of compassion. Especially when I was younger, I did not know how to uphold my boundaries while still being compassionate. Repeatedly other people were able to manipulate my naivity in this area.
I still need to work in several areas in the eight fold path and I should work on forgiving myself my naivity. I may always be working on the boundaries issue, but now I know exactly what my problem is. And I need to stop looking outside of myself for answers. I know that a lot of that is within myself already. If I do need to gather information from others, I know exactly how and where to find it. My instincts will let me know if the source of the information is reliable.
And this by the way came on the heels of a yoga instructor not responding to my repeatedly mentioning a certain pose was aggravating my sciatica. I got fed up and decided to search for some answers myself. First thing - the pose is contra-indicated for those with sciatica. Luckily, there are other poses which will help to heal the area or that I can do alternatively.
Once again, my so-called "teacher" did not respond. Once again I found the answer myself.
Lucky me I'm so bloody stubborn!!!
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